The most rivetting story you will ever read

There’s something I want to tell you all today.

Did you hear about the cat who wanted the plush cushion in the neighbour’s living room? She was fed up of the hard floors and the hard humans who surrounded her. Her paws hurt and her entire being cried out for the soft, velvety touch of the bright, red cushion next door.

Desperate, she made a deal with a family of mice. She would leave them alone if they went over to the neighbour’s house, chewed the cushion out a bit, and make the humans throw it out. The mice agreed, but what the cat didn’t know was that the grandpa-mouse had principles. He simply wouldn’t scurry around in the dark for their oldest enemy. Scurrying around in the dark was strictly for leisure purposes.

So he made a deal with a family of raccoons to nab the cat while she tried to retrieve the chewed-out cushion. The raccoons had nothing against cats, but this particular cat had cheated them out of a ferris wheel. They could never forget that.

On the day the deals were supposed to go down, all three parties converged in the neighbour’s backyard, with the bright-red cushion in the middle.

Before anyone could get the cushion or the cat, however, a flying saucer swooped down and snatched the neighbour along with the chewed out bright-red cushion. I believe the aliens were extremely perplexed upon seeing the raccoons, the mice and the cat, violently gathered around the bright-red cushion, and not one of them could do any explaining.



This was a silly story, folks. Sorry for the dupe. You know how it is with silly stories and you’re probably sure I’ve lost my marbles, but c’mon, everything makes too much sense these days. Amidst all these fantastical tales and scandals and real stories of horror and people being butt-hurt, I think we need more silly stories. Just for the effin’ heck of it. Spread some ridiculous joy. Like if you agree. Oh, and, share your own silly story pronto.





weird and dope art by Alejandro Giraldo

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